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World Class Athelete seeks partner for thrills, chills, big bucks and maybe a good neck rub or two (I'll miss Mike). I'm cute (some people say adorable), fit and ran the fastest last quarter of the Kentucky Derby since You Know Who!
I know that somewhere, out there in the racing world, there's the right jockey for me. Could it be you?
Patience is a must. I start slow but once I get going--let me put it this way--you'll never forget the ride!
Experience at winning mile and a half grade one races preferred, but I'll accept the common sense to just get the hell out of my way and let me do my thing. Wusses need not apply--you point me there and baby, I'm going--even if it looks like we are about to be turned into a horse and jockey sandwich by a couple of 17 hand brontosauruses in blinkers.
Must absolutely love the idea of destroying the egos of horses that cost more than the national debt of some 3rd world countries with a horse that originally cost less than a used Toyota. Better yet, must love the idea of destroying the egos of the jokers who shelled out more than more than the national debt of some 3rd world countries for these losers with a horse that originally cost less than a used Toyota.
Long term relationship preferred but will accept a one race stand. If you can't be in New York, ready to go, on June 6, 2009 don't even bother to respond to this ad. Seriously, I'm starting to get a complex about this.
I'd love it if you'd be willing to relocate to New Mexico but I'm willing to accept a committed long distance relationship.
Please send picture and resume to my trainer, [email protected]. Or, you know what, that cowboy hasn't exactly done me much good in the long term relationship department. Contact me directly at [email protected].
Let's make history together.
As for a certain filly and that two-timing Cajun--I'll see you at Belmont--you, me, my new jockey and the Big Sandy.
Ad on Craig's List. "Good Things Come in Small Packages
Moderators: Roguelet, hpkingjr, WaveMaster
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galleria10
- Maiden Special Weight
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Ad on Craig's List. "Good Things Come in Small Packages
Don't live your life by each
breath you take, but rather
the things that take your breath away
breath you take, but rather
the things that take your breath away
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galleria10
- Maiden Special Weight
- Posts: 184
- Joined: Sun Sep 17, 2006 1:09 pm
The AD
This was posted on a another site by "Brooklyn Cowgirl "
I thought it was SO FUNNY I wanted to share it with you. She wrote it herself, it was not a real ad just for a laugh...I thought she did a great job and I laughed my but off,,,ENJOY!!!!!
I thought it was SO FUNNY I wanted to share it with you. She wrote it herself, it was not a real ad just for a laugh...I thought she did a great job and I laughed my but off,,,ENJOY!!!!!
Don't live your life by each
breath you take, but rather
the things that take your breath away
breath you take, but rather
the things that take your breath away
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Vindicated
- Allowance Winner
- Posts: 342
- Joined: Tue Nov 09, 2004 7:46 am
Perhaps it should be 'posted' on Craig's List/Facebook, etc. as a humorous way to highlight one of the great moments in our sport, capture the general public's interest in the Belmont, horse racing, etc..
Would love to see this 'ad' brought up by Jay Leno or other late night host for it's comedic value - maybe even get the parties involved with MTB and RA on for an fun interview bit.
Would love to see this 'ad' brought up by Jay Leno or other late night host for it's comedic value - maybe even get the parties involved with MTB and RA on for an fun interview bit.
I'm sure that in his career as a trainer, Woolley has had many jocks spin him, especially this year with his 1-for-32 record. But I'll bet he can't believe that he can't keep a jock on the Derby winner.
Personally, I don't think they will run Rachel in the Belmont. She hasn't done well in the past with short breaks between races, and what has she got left to prove against this crop of boys until the BC Classic? If I were them I'd try for the Acorn and the Filly Triple Crown and then take on the boys in November. By then, maybe Zenyetta will be the only thing that looks like it can beat her. That would leave Calvin a chance to jump back on MTB for the Belmont.
Personally, I don't think they will run Rachel in the Belmont. She hasn't done well in the past with short breaks between races, and what has she got left to prove against this crop of boys until the BC Classic? If I were them I'd try for the Acorn and the Filly Triple Crown and then take on the boys in November. By then, maybe Zenyetta will be the only thing that looks like it can beat her. That would leave Calvin a chance to jump back on MTB for the Belmont.
"When I am on my deathbed, I imagine I will say, 'Thank God I did that'" - Arthur Hancock, on buying back Gato del Sol from Europe after Exceller was killed in a slaughterhouse in Sweden.
majxmom wrote:Personally, I don't think they will run Rachel in the Belmont. She hasn't done well in the past with short breaks between races, and what has she got left to prove against this crop of boys until the BC Classic? If I were them I'd try for the Acorn and the Filly Triple Crown and then take on the boys in November. By then, maybe Zenyetta will be the only thing that looks like it can beat her. That would leave Calvin a chance to jump back on MTB for the Belmont.
I'm not sure the new connections will be able to keep their egoes under control. I hope I'm wrong on that. The horse should come first.
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galleria10
- Maiden Special Weight
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- Joined: Sun Sep 17, 2006 1:09 pm
LOL Part II
Dear Mine That Bird,
I'm the jockey you're seeking. I'm 54 years old... a mature, seasoned rider, but still young at heart with an impish spirit and grin. I retired from active racing 7 years ago, but currently run a jockey school in KY so I'm still in shape and my riding skills are still sharp.
My credentials and experience are impeccable. Just to name a few... I'm in the Racing Hall of Fame. I've won more Graded Stakes and Awards than you can shake a whip at and that includes the Belmont Stakes (twice) and the Breeders Cup Classic (5 times).
The most important thing as far as you're concerned though is this... The best horse I ever rode was very much like you... a small, plain brown gelding who nobody expected would ever amount to much.
He got no respect early in his career either, but by the time I had the honor of riding him the other horses that faced him knew they were in for a battle and most of the times they lost it.
His name was John Henry and you may have heard whispers that you remind a lot of people of him.
I think we could be a match made on eHorseHarmony dot com.
Hope to hear from you... times a wastin'
Chris McCarron
I'm the jockey you're seeking. I'm 54 years old... a mature, seasoned rider, but still young at heart with an impish spirit and grin. I retired from active racing 7 years ago, but currently run a jockey school in KY so I'm still in shape and my riding skills are still sharp.
My credentials and experience are impeccable. Just to name a few... I'm in the Racing Hall of Fame. I've won more Graded Stakes and Awards than you can shake a whip at and that includes the Belmont Stakes (twice) and the Breeders Cup Classic (5 times).
The most important thing as far as you're concerned though is this... The best horse I ever rode was very much like you... a small, plain brown gelding who nobody expected would ever amount to much.
He got no respect early in his career either, but by the time I had the honor of riding him the other horses that faced him knew they were in for a battle and most of the times they lost it.
His name was John Henry and you may have heard whispers that you remind a lot of people of him.
I think we could be a match made on eHorseHarmony dot com.
Hope to hear from you... times a wastin'
Chris McCarron
Don't live your life by each
breath you take, but rather
the things that take your breath away
breath you take, but rather
the things that take your breath away
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galleria10
- Maiden Special Weight
- Posts: 184
- Joined: Sun Sep 17, 2006 1:09 pm
Even funnier PART III
Dear Chris:
I am intrigued by your offer. I've looked up your record and WOW! It's also very important to me personally to have a jockey who likes small bay geldings. Your old friend John Henry was really something.
I'd be all for it but I'm problems convincing Chip. You see--can I be blunt-- it's about your age--he just can't get past the idea that you're 54 years old. Maybe it's his rodeo background. I've been trying to convince him that in racing, where horse and rider are partners, riders can last longer than they do in his old discipline of bronc riding where the horse is basicly trying to put the rider in the hospital but he just doesn't seem to get it.
Mind you, I like Chip. His ability to think out of the box has helped me get to where I am today. I mean who but an old rodeo cowboy would have thought it would be OK to put a horse in a trailer and drive halfway across the country to the Kentucky Derby. Let me tell you though, I LOVE road trips. When I told Pioneer of the Nile that I travel in my own box stall on wheels he was SOOO jealous. He had to ship in a van with Rachel Alexandra and Friesan Fire. Between Rachel yacking all the way about how she was going to mate with some superstud named Curlin and have superbabies and Fire griping about how Larry Jones should discover something called Slimfast, the poor guy was ready to slit his fetlocks by the time they hit the Maryland boarder.
It's not just you. He's also not crazy about my old GF Chantal Sutherland. That's too bad because I like her and, please don't be offended, she smells better than you male jocks. Too inexperienced. He says. So it turns out we're looking for a jockey who's experienced but not real old and doesn't have a date for Belmont day. He really wants Calvin but of course Calvin's still with Rachel--unless Rachel doesn't run then he'll go with me.
I'm not sure how I feel about that.
Calvin keeps going on and on about how I didn't pass Rachel in the gallop out after the Preakness. YO CALVIN, you think I'm stupid or something. Racing 101, buddy, when you pass the wire and the jockey stands up it's over. Time to go back to the barn, cool out and hit the shower before enjoying a good roll or go into that winner's circle thingy where everyone makes a big fuss and then you get to go back to the barn, cool out and hit the shower before enjoying a good roll. Maybe you need to put a little education in that Curlin obsessed filly's head. She needs to take better care of herself.
Well gotta go. I see my groom with the tack. Time to take Charlie out for another gallop around Churchill Downs.
I just love my job!
Birdy
I am intrigued by your offer. I've looked up your record and WOW! It's also very important to me personally to have a jockey who likes small bay geldings. Your old friend John Henry was really something.
I'd be all for it but I'm problems convincing Chip. You see--can I be blunt-- it's about your age--he just can't get past the idea that you're 54 years old. Maybe it's his rodeo background. I've been trying to convince him that in racing, where horse and rider are partners, riders can last longer than they do in his old discipline of bronc riding where the horse is basicly trying to put the rider in the hospital but he just doesn't seem to get it.
Mind you, I like Chip. His ability to think out of the box has helped me get to where I am today. I mean who but an old rodeo cowboy would have thought it would be OK to put a horse in a trailer and drive halfway across the country to the Kentucky Derby. Let me tell you though, I LOVE road trips. When I told Pioneer of the Nile that I travel in my own box stall on wheels he was SOOO jealous. He had to ship in a van with Rachel Alexandra and Friesan Fire. Between Rachel yacking all the way about how she was going to mate with some superstud named Curlin and have superbabies and Fire griping about how Larry Jones should discover something called Slimfast, the poor guy was ready to slit his fetlocks by the time they hit the Maryland boarder.
It's not just you. He's also not crazy about my old GF Chantal Sutherland. That's too bad because I like her and, please don't be offended, she smells better than you male jocks. Too inexperienced. He says. So it turns out we're looking for a jockey who's experienced but not real old and doesn't have a date for Belmont day. He really wants Calvin but of course Calvin's still with Rachel--unless Rachel doesn't run then he'll go with me.
I'm not sure how I feel about that.
Calvin keeps going on and on about how I didn't pass Rachel in the gallop out after the Preakness. YO CALVIN, you think I'm stupid or something. Racing 101, buddy, when you pass the wire and the jockey stands up it's over. Time to go back to the barn, cool out and hit the shower before enjoying a good roll or go into that winner's circle thingy where everyone makes a big fuss and then you get to go back to the barn, cool out and hit the shower before enjoying a good roll. Maybe you need to put a little education in that Curlin obsessed filly's head. She needs to take better care of herself.
Well gotta go. I see my groom with the tack. Time to take Charlie out for another gallop around Churchill Downs.
I just love my job!
Birdy
Don't live your life by each
breath you take, but rather
the things that take your breath away
breath you take, but rather
the things that take your breath away
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galleria10
- Maiden Special Weight
- Posts: 184
- Joined: Sun Sep 17, 2006 1:09 pm
Author
These were all written by "Brooklyn Cowgirl" on another site. I want to make sure she gets the credit...I wish I was this creative...Enjoy...there is more to come...
Don't live your life by each
breath you take, but rather
the things that take your breath away
breath you take, but rather
the things that take your breath away
Re: Author
galleria10 wrote:These were all written by "Brooklyn Cowgirl" on another site. I want to make sure she gets the credit...I wish I was this creative...Enjoy...there is more to come...
Thanks for posting. She is very clever and we are having a great chuckle over her wit. If anyone knows the poster, tell her that she is now getting laughs world wide.
