It's also disappointing that these two never cover the KY Derby for NBC:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OTZxXkGLrfs
Biggest Derby Disappointment
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Rokeby Forever
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What synthetics are to California racing:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gb0mxcpPOU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gb0mxcpPOU
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Rokeby Forever
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- Joined: Thu Dec 21, 2006 4:52 pm
- Location: Reno, NV
You should. 
(Guess what color my mane is?)
By the way, I LOVE dumb blonde jokes. Of course, the reason they're usually so short is so that brunettes can remember the punch lines!
(Guess what color my mane is?)
By the way, I LOVE dumb blonde jokes. Of course, the reason they're usually so short is so that brunettes can remember the punch lines!
"A man who was merely a man and said the sort of things Jesus said would not be a great moral teacher...You must make your choice. Either this man was, and is, the Son of God: or else a madman or something worse." C. S. Lewis
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Rokeby Forever
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Funny!
Three blondes were in a forest.
One said, "I think these are deer tracks."
Another said, "I think these are rabbit tracks."
The third got hit by the train.
Another?
Two blondes were walking and found a compact kit on the sidewalk. One picked it up, opened it, looked in the mirror, and said, "This girl looks familiar!"
The other one grabbed it, looked at it, and said, "Idiot...it's me!"
Three blondes were in a forest.
One said, "I think these are deer tracks."
Another said, "I think these are rabbit tracks."
The third got hit by the train.
Another?
Two blondes were walking and found a compact kit on the sidewalk. One picked it up, opened it, looked in the mirror, and said, "This girl looks familiar!"
The other one grabbed it, looked at it, and said, "Idiot...it's me!"
Mahubah wrote:You should.
By the way, I LOVE dumb blonde jokes. Of course, the reason they're usually so short is so that brunettes can remember the punch lines!
A great man cannot help himself," "He can see things that other men cannot see themselves, and his greatness lies in doing whatever is necessary to make his vision real
ran across these today
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking,
and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther
away... Florida or the moon?"
The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see
Florida?????"
There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and
sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts,
"How can I get to the other side?"
The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and
shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."
redhead joke, not really
A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said
that her body hurt wherever she touched it.
"Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me."
The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and
screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She
pushed her knee and screamed;
likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched
made her scream.
The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you?
"Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde."
"I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken."
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking,
and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther
away... Florida or the moon?"
The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see
Florida?????"
There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and
sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts,
"How can I get to the other side?"
The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and
shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."
redhead joke, not really
A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said
that her body hurt wherever she touched it.
"Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me."
The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and
screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She
pushed her knee and screamed;
likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched
made her scream.
The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you?
"Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde."
"I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken."
Mahubah wrote:By the way, Madelyn, do you notice that no one picks on redheads?
I think it's because redheads are notoriously hot-tempered and people are afraid of retaliation.
How about tri-color jokes? The ones with the blond, the redhead and the brunette? Notice also they are always about women? I guess men cut their hair short so its color doesn't affect their IQ in the same way.
So Run for the Roses, as fast as you can.....
A few days ago I was having some work done at my local garage. A blonde came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten. We all looked at each other and another customer asked, "What is a seven-hundred-ten?" She
replied, "You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine, I have lost it and need a new one.." She replied that she did not know exactly what it was, but this piece had always been there. The mechanic gave her a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like. She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710. He then took her over to another car which had its hood up and asked "is there a 710 on this car?" She pointed and said, "Of course, its right there." If you're not sure what a 710 is Click Here: http://www.hotautoweb.com/cogifs/710.jpg
replied, "You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine, I have lost it and need a new one.." She replied that she did not know exactly what it was, but this piece had always been there. The mechanic gave her a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like. She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710. He then took her over to another car which had its hood up and asked "is there a 710 on this car?" She pointed and said, "Of course, its right there." If you're not sure what a 710 is Click Here: http://www.hotautoweb.com/cogifs/710.jpg
A blonde came into a bank in New York City and said, "I'd like to take out a $10,000 loan. As security, I'll put up my new Lamborghini."
The bank officers, of course, told her that she didn't need to leave so expensive a car as security for the loan, but the lady insisted and finally got her way, leaving her keys with the bank. As she left, one of the bank staff muttered, "What a dumb blonde!" Then, of course, the bank staff moved the car into safekeeping.
Three weeks later, the lady came back, tanned and smiling, and said, "I'd like to repay my loan now, please." She paid the $10,000, plus the $50 in interest, and one of the junior bank staff went to get her car for her.
As the blonde started for the door, a bank officer finally couldn't help himself. He said, "Ma'am, you just paid $50 in loan fees plus $50 in interest for a three-week loan. Why on earth did you do that?"
The blonde grinned and said, "I just went on a three-week cruise to the Mediterranean. Can you think of anyplace else in New York where I could have had my car safely stored for three weeks in a parking garage with 24-hour security for just $100?"
The bank officers, of course, told her that she didn't need to leave so expensive a car as security for the loan, but the lady insisted and finally got her way, leaving her keys with the bank. As she left, one of the bank staff muttered, "What a dumb blonde!" Then, of course, the bank staff moved the car into safekeeping.
Three weeks later, the lady came back, tanned and smiling, and said, "I'd like to repay my loan now, please." She paid the $10,000, plus the $50 in interest, and one of the junior bank staff went to get her car for her.
As the blonde started for the door, a bank officer finally couldn't help himself. He said, "Ma'am, you just paid $50 in loan fees plus $50 in interest for a three-week loan. Why on earth did you do that?"
The blonde grinned and said, "I just went on a three-week cruise to the Mediterranean. Can you think of anyplace else in New York where I could have had my car safely stored for three weeks in a parking garage with 24-hour security for just $100?"
"A man who was merely a man and said the sort of things Jesus said would not be a great moral teacher...You must make your choice. Either this man was, and is, the Son of God: or else a madman or something worse." C. S. Lewis
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Rokeby Forever
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- Posts: 6684
- Joined: Thu Dec 21, 2006 4:52 pm
- Location: Reno, NV
A blonde lost her job, so to try to make "ends meet," she decided to do odd jobs in her neighborhood. She knocked on front doors and asked neighbors if she could do some household work.
One neighbor agreed. He gave her two cans of white paint and said, "I'll give you $50 if you paint my porch. Just ring the front bell when you're finished."
Five minutes later, she rang the bell.
The neighbor was stunned! He asked, "My goodness, how did you finish so quickly? She replied, "It wasn't a hard job. I didn't even need the second can of paint!"
The neighbor said, "You saved me from having to do an all day chore by finishing my porch in just five minutes - maybe I should pay you double!"
The blonde said, "That's OK, the job was easy. And, Mister, you don't have a porch...you have a Ferrari!"
One neighbor agreed. He gave her two cans of white paint and said, "I'll give you $50 if you paint my porch. Just ring the front bell when you're finished."
Five minutes later, she rang the bell.
The neighbor was stunned! He asked, "My goodness, how did you finish so quickly? She replied, "It wasn't a hard job. I didn't even need the second can of paint!"
The neighbor said, "You saved me from having to do an all day chore by finishing my porch in just five minutes - maybe I should pay you double!"
The blonde said, "That's OK, the job was easy. And, Mister, you don't have a porch...you have a Ferrari!"